His grand Mage and other ships
by China Sorrows Worshipper
Summary: One late evening in the office of a grand Mage.One shot. Though i could be persuaded into making a series of one shots or a full story. First skulduggery pleasant fanfiction. :D okay it is now a series of one shots!
1. Chapter 1

**hi worshipers of the golden god e.g. Derek Landy. This is my first skulduggery pleasant fanfiction. Now I know lots of people ship valduggery but this is my own personal opinion. Please no mean reviews . :D**

_**DISCLAIMER**_

_**i do not own the skulduggery pleasant series. All rights go to Derek Landy.**_

He had come to her office after finishing a case. It was late but she had made a new rule saying all detectives must come to report to her immediately after their case was completed. He carefully opened the door and smiled at the sleeping form of his grand mage. Her head was leaning against the desk,covered with paperwork and reports, and here hand was loosely gripping a pen. Still smiling, he took off his hat and placed it on the coat rack, next to her fur coat as it was a cold winter in Ireland. He walked silently towards her peaceful form and then knelt by her. Then slowly but gently shook her awake. Her eyes, those beautiful ice blue eyes, fluttered open and then focused on him.

"Trust you to come in the middle of the night." She mumbled still dragging herself from sleep. He smiled again , then went to put his hat on again.

"Skulduggery" she paused" why did you really come here?"

He froze. " tell her, just bloody tell her" his mind told him.

"Skulduggery?" She asked again.

He turned around and said " because of this". He then activated his façade and grabbed her. She struggled until his lips crashed onto hers. She stiffened . Then slowly became relaxed and began to return it. She wrapped her arms around his neck, he wrapped his around her waist. After awhile they broke apart.

" I should give you some more evening cases" she murmured.

" I agree completely" he told her sincerely before pulling her in for another kiss.


	2. Update

**okay. You guys have already persuaded me to do a series of one shot pairings. you managed that in around about an hour. That's amazing. You Golden God worshipers do make real magic! I will try and upload the next one today in the evening or tomorrow morning. Once again thanks for the support! Also for each chapter tell me what pairing you want me to do and what is your favourite ship! Mine is definitely chinduggery but that's my personal opinion. And for the third time a massive big thanks!**


	3. Sanguine Valkyrie

**_disclaimer_**

**I do not own the skulduggery pleasant series. All rights go to de Golden God e.g. Derek Landy**

It took all his will power to pretend to hate her. After all how could you pretend to hate someone who you love so much. How can you hate someone who looks so much like an angel.

" angel?" He thought to himself" is old sanguine getting soft?!"

He snorted. " that would be strange indeed."

For he was a hit man deluxe, villain. There was no room for mercy, for _fondness_.

But he wasn't always a villain. There were days when he dreamed of being a good guy. When he would run to watch the warriors return home and he would be filled with awe. But those days were long gone. He guessed that maybe he should have fought harder to stay a good guy. After all it is hard to be the villain to your love .

**so what do ya think or as sanguine would say " what do y'all think!"**

**i know it's quite short but I wanted to write one quickly for you guys..:D again please tell me what ship you want next!**


	4. Ghanith

**Hey guys I'm back again. Did you miss me?(u probably didn't! :D) this is a ghanith cause it's sooo tragic and beautiful. Again tell me what pairings you want me to write about!**

**Disclaimer **

**i do not own skulduggery pleasant all rights go to Derek landy!**

He's gone.

He's gone forever.

A translucent tear trickled down the wet, glistening path which many other tears had traveled down in the past minute. Curly, blonde strands of hair stuck to her face as she silently grieved. Her eyes , which once sparkled with excitement, were now blank and dull.

" it's probably better that way." She thought" that way no one knows of my pain". She looked down at what lay in her calloused hand. A small photo showing a man with a beaming smile plastered to his face. He had scars criss crossing all over his head but that didn't matter. It didn't matter that he didn't have Saracen's wit or charm, it didn't matter that he didn't have Dexter's muscles and looks. He was wonderful in his own way. He was kind, honest,noble and brave. So brave.

" stop" she told herself" you'll make it worse".

And it's true. The tears were threatening to start again. She closed her eyes and fell back on the bed. She kept them closed till she fell asleep. There she was happy. Because in her dreams he was always there. In her dreams he would never leave her. Never.

**So how was that? Did I break your heart?( evil laugh ;D) any ideas for the next one shot? Also I'm holding a poll for which ship is the best! Once again thank you for reading, although it was short, and please review!**


	5. Jaron

**Right. This going to be a pairing no one expected. China/Jaron. It's strange. Deal with it.**

**Disclaimer **

**I do not own the skulduggery pleasant series. All rights go to Derek Landy.**

She was perfect for him. Beautiful, exciting, deadly, dangerous. His own warrior queen. But she couldn't have him. No man could touch the mistress of Mevolent. Not even her own husband. But that didn't stop him loving her. No , he would wait till she was free.

1796

She was longer Mevolent's mistress. Her husband had died in suspicious circumstances. And now she was his. And he was hers. And he would follow her for eternity. They would never be apart. Or would they.

1801

She was married again. And yet she became Mevolent's mistress again. He was heartbroken. He swore to never love her again for it would be too painful for him.

1805

He couldn't resist helping her escape. She was running from Mevolent's furious wrath. And of course she asked him to help. With her gorgeous raven hair swept over her shoulder and her ice blue eyes wide and pleading. Who could resist such an angel? Who could see the demon in her head?

1806

She's dead. She's gone. After escaping a pair of enemy soldiers found her. Apparently they tortured her till her death. Her body was found in front of the gates. When Mevolent heard the news, he hunched over on his throne in his grief, as he realised it was his fault that she ran away. But Jaron was different. No grief was really shown at the loss of his leader. At the loss of a great friend. Of a great love.

1807

She tricked us. The whole of Mevolent's army! How could she! Betray the only people who understand her, who accept her! It's an outrage!

2009

It's been decades since he last saw her. But he hasn't forgotten her. But now he's finally here. He's talking to her. And god she's changed. No more is the edgy, dark side of her character seen. Instead it is replaced with a serene mask hiding her true personality. She's become a demon with a mask.

2011

Again he helped her when she needed it. Now he wished he hadn't. 7 seconds before his brain shuts down. His life flashes before his eyes and then one last thought crosses his mind.

" She really did become a demon with a mask.

**Very dark and tragic but that's me! I'll try to do a more happy one next time! Again any review would be lovely!**


	6. Poor lonely fletcher

** Hi guys! Right today is... Fletchyrie! I know most people think this ship has died but I still love it so here we go.I'm going to try to write a valduggery later BUT it might not be posted because I usually can't write valduggery to save my life! Anyways thank so much for the support I've been getting (and the constructive criticism..) it really does help making me want to post new chapter! On to the disclaimer :)**

**Disclaimer**

**I do not own skulduggery pleasant or I would not be writing this. All right go to Derek Landy.**

He loved her.

And he hated that.

How she could still own his heart after shattering it into a million pieces. How he could love someone who had such a cold heart.

Why did he love someone so selfish?!

Maybe she isn't he thought. Maybe I was.

He shook it off , trying to stay angry at her, trying to keep fury's flame burning longer. But he couldn't . He realised that. In the relationship , she was the fire, the flame, not him. No he was the sea, gentle and calm but sometimes turns into a storm. He couldn't hold it against her anymore.

He collapsed in the street, in the rain, in his grief and heartache. He couldn't hold it in anymore . He had to. Just one last time. Before he could let her go.

" Valkyrie," he whispered," I love you."

**I know that was really short but I was kinda in a rush. Well what do ya think? Once again please review and tell me what pairing/ship you would like next! Peace.**


	7. Party! Party! Valduggery!

**Disclaimer**

**I do not own skulduggery pleasant. All rights go to Derek Landy.**

"Do you like bunnies?" Valkyrie asked, " do you?"

Skulduggery froze.

" Why are you asking me this?"

She shrugged

" Because it's Easter soon! Surely you know about that!"

He sighed " yes. I did know that thanks to you yapping about it since I've met you."

" well you can't blame me for being excited! I get chocolate and see cute bunnies!"

He sighed again.

" How are they cute?"

She froze then turned around with a murderous face.

" Did you. Just say. That freakin bunnies! Are not cute! Did you?!"

He hung his head.

" maybe.." She screamed at him and pounced on him. She then started pummelling his body.

"How. Dare. You!" She screeched at him through gritted teeth.

" it's not my fault that I don't find aggressive, deadly monsters cute!"

She stopped hitting him then looked at him and burst out laughing

" you ... are ...afraid...of...bunnies!" She gasped out still laughing hard.

Skulduggery crossed his arms and tried to look skeptical. " Me? Afraid of bunnies ?! Ridiculous !" He exclaimed. But it was too late. Valkyrie would not listen to him. After her laughing had slowly died down, she did the unexpected. She wrapped her arms around him.

" I love you, you ridiculous skeleton."

" And I love you, you strange girl."

**There. It's done. I promised valduggery so here it is! It is probably the worst thing you've ever read but oh well. I'm not good at writing valduggery but I did my best. Anyway please leave reviews and what ships you want next! Also I'm thinking of starting a series of one shots when the sp characters are little children. E.g. You get to see skulduggery stutter! And china being goofy round her big brother!**


	8. Ravel

**I, am a despicable human being. I haven't updated for awhile. So sorry about that! And next week I'm going to be away so I won't be able to update at all! Right this is probably the weirdest love triangle you have ever seen but don't blame it on me! You can blame it on this lovely fellow here**

* * *

**The army dog gaming fan- you inspired me to write this after a long list of pms.. roundabout 15 before I agreed to do it. You are an amazing writer!**

**Disclaimer**

**I do not own the skulduggery pleasant series. All rights go to Derek Landy.**

The door slammed against the wall as it was bashed opened. Ravel looked up and his eyes slowly widened in horror. Standing above him in full blood red armour was Mevolent himself. His features were chiseled as if he had been sculpted into a perfect piece of artwork. His eyes were deep blue, so dark they were almost black. Ravel shrank back into the chair, realising why people where so afraid of this, this person. There was something about him. A stench, a power he could not tell what it was only something horrible.

" So," Mevolent drawled out. His voice had a deep husky, velvety tone. It was almost.. Seductive.

" This is one of the fabled members of the dead men. " he looked at ravel.

" Tell me who do you think is the most.. dangerous member of your group?"

Ravel blinked. "Why would I ever tell you that?!"

Mevolent almost roared as he laughed.

Ravel winced as he was extremely loud.

"Ever considered the possibility of being tortured or your loved ones being tortured? I've always found that method quite effective. For example my mistress. People rumoured that she was involved in the death of my wife and her sister. They also said that I was too. " he turned round to a crystal chalice filled with wine. " do you know how she came to pass away?"

Ravel gulped." N-no".

"It came to my ears she had had formed an.. attachment to someone. And it was not friendship. No, behind my back she would sneak out to see this.. lover of hers." He slammed the chalice back down on the table, after draining the contents.

"After I heard the news, I gave out the order for her to be disposed of, to the only person I could trust. Her sister. My dear China." His face almost gave into a smile.

"She formed an exquisite plan. Simply bring her to us. By the screams of her lover. By nightfall she was dead. Executed for adultery. All because of her attachment."

He turned around.

"Are you willing to risk the people you've formed relationships with? Are you ready to let them die for you?"

Ravel looked down and shook his head.

" good then let us start."

3 hours later.

" what about you? I've heard nothing about what you are like? Of course there are the rumours about you that I've heard. That no lady can resist you. I believe those I think." He looked at ravel.

"But I do have one question." He strolled closer to him.

"Can a-" he paused," can a man resist you?"

Ravel's eyes shot up and before he could register what was happening, a pair of lips were slammed against his. They were rough but strangely lush. At first he tensed then relaxed and started to return. After awhile they stopped and just looked at each other, panting.

" tell no one about this." Muttered Mevolent.

"Especially China. I need her more than ever now."

4 years later

The ballroom was bustling with life as sorcerers relished in the peace and entertainment it offered. But ravel had his eyes on only one person. He watched as Mevolent danced. He watched as Mevolent chatted and humoured himself with other sorcerers. He watched as he sat down for the banquet. As he sat down himself, he saw a woman being beckoned up to Mevolent. As she passed ravel, he noticed her ice blue eyes and long raven hair. China sorrows. He continued watching him for the rest of the evening. Even when his heart was shattered into a million pieces as he watched the man passionately kiss his mistress. Even when mevolent looked at him , saying " forget it, it's over".

Because he couldn't.

And that was his torture.

**So weird and yet I'm loving the tragic one sided love. As you can see I can't help but add china into all my stories but I made her his mistress in another ship so I decided to continue the idea! Please leave a review!**


	9. Mina? Chevolent?

Do**n't kill me! Please I beg you! I know I've been away an infinitely long time. But. I got the new chapter!**

**Disclaimer**

**I own nothing. Which is sad. Cause I wanted a panda when I was little.**

The party was well underway.

Glasses clinking, guests laughing and dancing, it was obvious everyone was enjoying it.

Except her.

She darted between conversations and exchanges, constantly glancing over her shoulder. She cursed under her breath for having attracted the one man she didn't want. She dodged a waiter and headed for lord Damien.

"Good evening Damien." She greeted him politely.

" Ah China! A good evening to you too! Why you look splendid my dear. I have to say you are quite the subject of talk recently."

She looked at him, one eyebrow raised.

"And why would that be?"

"Don't play fool with me my dear. One need to only glance at you and Mevolent to see what is going on"

She sighed and looked pointedly at him.

"Why me?"

He looked at her in shock.

"It's an honour to be his mistress!"

"If your a woman, you would see differently."

"Well I suppose you better get going then, if it's such a disaster. Your predator is approaching."

She looked over her shoulder and cursed, seeing Mevolent walking towards her.

"Well then I bid you goodnight sir." She smiled then hurried off.

Too late.

A hand grabbed her arm and pulled her to the owner of it.

"You are a very difficult woman to catch miss Sorrows." Mevolent remarked as he raised her hand to his lips.

"Not as hard as you are to lose your grace." She retorted back.

He smiled at her playfully.

"Do we really have to be so formal?"

She grinned at him.

"It's only for the lovely audience watching." He smirked. "True. I suppose since none of them knew about us before the rumours began, we must warm them up to the prospect." She grinned at him again.

"Aren't you a schemer?"

"Nay my lady, only very intelligent."

She snorted in a ladylike manner.

"I beg to differ."

He placed a kiss on her forehead. She sighed.

"You really shouldn't think you can get out of an argument by kissing at me."

He grinned that lopsided grin of his.

"Oh I don't think. I know."

**! Please tell me what ship you want next!**


	10. Valduggery 2

**700\. 700 freakin views. Wow. I. Am. Amazed.**

**Thank you to all my lovely reviewers! To name a couple..**

**MehScrewIt, Scarlet Bloodwhite and Deadgirl19! Thanks so much for the support!**

**Disclaimer**

**It's sad. I don't own anything. Not even that fluffy pink cushion next to me.**

**On with the story!**

"Valkyrie."

"Yes?" She replied innocently.

"Where. Are. My. Hats." He said behind gritted teeth.

"Ummm. I don't know?" She said hesitantly.

"Then why are there these things there instead?!"

He lifted up a baseball cap and looked at her. She held back her smile.

"Anything else you want to know?"

He tilted his head, thinking.

"Do you know where my pinstriped suit is?"

She burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?!" He demanded.

"Look..in...the...wardrobe!" She gasped.

He walked to the dressing room and opened the wardrobe. He turned back to look at her.

"That is not funny." He crossed his arms and did a skeleton glare.

Behind him in the closet was a pair of jeans and trainers! There were also a T-shirt saying " I heart bunnies".

He continued to glare at her.

"Give it back."

"Nope."

"Yes"

"Nope"

"Yes!"

"Nope"

"Yes!"

"Nope"

"YES!"

"Nope"

"You will god damn give it to me right now!"

"Calm your horses"

"I WILL NOT CALM DOWN UNTIL YOU GIVE IT TO ME!"

"Fine."

"Really?"

"No."

"I hate you."

"Love you too."

**You know the drill... Hopefully.**

**Also please answer my poll for a new story I will be writing! Sorry for hardly updating but let me tell you why. I have to revise for**

**24 exams. Basically I would revise 24 hours.**


	11. Sad chinduggery

**This is sad. I'm sorry.**

**_Disclaimer_**

**I own nothing. Except these tears of shame.**

**On with the sad story**

"Look me in the eye. Tell me you don't want me. Tell me you want to forget. Tell me you've given up on me. Tell me you can't give me any more second chances. Tell me you hate me.

Then.

I won't cry. I will argue. I will fight. I won't give up. I won't leave you.

Till

You tell me that you feel nothing. That you feel used. That you feel unhappy. That I'm a liar. That I'm a betrayer. That you can't live. That you can't love me. Because I don't.

Then.

I will let you go. I will give up. I will cry. I will die.

So tell me the truth."

He lifts her head up and places a kiss on those delicate lips, one last kiss, and then stares into those ice blue eyes that have melted.

"Tell me."

She looks up with a sheen of tears covering her eyes. That then disappear.

"Nothing."

She then runs away.

He lets her go. He lets her give up on him. He lets her hate him. He lets her unlove him. He lets her ignore him. He lets her cry about him.

He lets her die because of him.

**Short but not sweet.**

**But please do vote on the poll on my profile for the ship for the new story! So far it's dusk winning. If so china could become a 'vampire'.**


	12. Ceilings and a Yeti

**Hey guys! Haven't update this for ages but realised I hadn't answered some requests for this still, so I decided to restart this one for a bit to complete it. This one is for a guest who I hope enjoys it! And for those reading my other fic, I will update that next week. **

**Disclaimer**

**I don't own any of the characters, save for the yeti. And of course the variation of twinkle twinkle litter star. But what other song describes Clarabelle?!**

**On with the Fluffiness!**

Ceilings are evil, Fletcher had concluded from his time in the Medical Wing. He had been staring at it for the past two hours, twenty minutes, fifty four seconds and counting.

While rescuing a sorcerer and his kids from a collapsing house in Roarhaven, a piece of the roof had landed on both of Fletcher's legs. He had no idea what he'd had done to upset it. Maybe it couldn't stand the awesomeness of his hair?

He sighed, continuing to look up at the ceiling. He could hear the distant sound of someone singing some weird version of twinkle twinkle little star. He sighed. It was probably Clarabelle.

"Twinkle, twinkle, big fat star! Do I wonder how you are? Do you like to be so high?"

The voice stopped. Fletcher could hear her muttering under her breath about the wrong words.

True enough to his guess, a shock of blue hair appeared from behind the curtain covering his bed. He could just make out her eyes from underneath her luminous bangs.

"Hi Fletcher! You don't look too good. Did you have a fight with a polar bear?"

Fletcher blinked. "A.. polar bear?"

"Yeah, you know. The big white fluffy things," Clarabelle said dreamily, stacking clean sheets hazardously against the wall, "They often have great big yellow eyes and pointy teeth! And they loom over you on those long legs. Or that could be a Yeti."

Fletcher tried to contain his smile.

"Have you ever seen a Yeti?"

"No, but I imagine that they look like that. Besides, they must be tall otherwise they would have houses with ceilings. And a Yeti doesn't have ceilings! Therefore it must be tall."

She frowned at the towels, which were close to collapsing. She then nodded happily and turned around.

"Hope you feel better soon Fletcher. And don't play with a Yeti again, even if it's a baby one!"

She happily skipped off, continuing to sing along the way. Fletcher started to laugh. Maybe being in the Medical wing wasn't as bad as he though it was.


	13. Skulduggery and Val

**Hey guys! Thought I'd try my hand again at oneshots, so here is a cute Skulduggery and Valkyrie one! **

Skulduggery stared out of the car window, into the pouring rain and dark street.

He and Valkyrie were waiting outside the house of a sorcerer, who had been smuggling copies of rare books across the world, putting many collectors out of business. Skulduggery wondered if this was the real reason China had sent them to arrest him rather than just the man breaking the law.

They had sat there for two hours already, listening to the static voices on the radio, with Skulduggery occasionally snapping his fingers to produce a flame so Valkyrie would stop moaning about the cold.

He frowned, as he felt that something was off. He looked at Valkyrie, who had been playing angry birds on her phone, muttering something about a sorcerer loving it.

He turned back to the window, looking outside. But there it was again, something in the back of his mind telling him something. He sighed.

"Valkyrie, stop poking me."

Valkyrie looked up, with wide innocent eyes.

"What? _I'm_ not poking you."

Skulduggery glared as hard as he could with a skull for a face, before turning around.

With one more minute of complete silence, Skulduggery grew hopeful.

"I'm not going to stop poking you until you talk."

Skulduggery groaned.


	14. Ghanith and Fletchyrie

**Here are two little oneshots, in time for Valentine's Day!**

"I'm not going to apologise for this. Not anymore."

Valkyrie leaned against the doorway of the bathroom, glaring directly at Fletcher, who was trying his best to seem as intimidating.

The two had been at it for the past five minutes, previously silent until this moment.

Valkyrie still made no sound, burning holes into Fletcher's head. Fletcher swallowed nervously before starting to speak again.

"I've apologised enough already for something so pointless."

Valkyrie continued to glare, sticking out a hand for him to put the object in. He stood still.

"Fletcher. Give it to me."

"No."

"Yes."

"No!"

Valkyrie sighed, before shouting, "Give me the goddamn hairspray Fletcher."

Ghastly looked at the book, his face screwed up in intense concentration. Tanith couldn't help but smile at his effort.

Ghastly looked up, trying to hide the fact that he had absolutely no clue what to do.

"You know, Ghastly? I'm sure Lil wouldn't mind if I-"

"No, I can do this!" Ghastly bolted upright, clutching the book to his chest.

"Besides, I wouldn't want her to think I couldn't be bothered to."

Tanith nodded. "Alright then, if you are sure?"

"I'm up to the challenge."

"Okay then. For the fairy cakes, we'll need.."


End file.
